Monday, August 25, 2014

The last first day

Today was a big last day. It's the last first day of school for my son Kyle. He is a senior this year. It was also the last first day of elementary school for my little Mr. P. He is in sixth grade this year. It's hard to think that if all goes as Kyle hopes by next summer he will be out on his own, and my baby will be in Junior High next year. May not seem like a big deal to most but to me it is. 
I remember holding both of them after bad dreams and teaching them both to brush their teeth. I remember bed time stories and songs and "Can you tuck me in?" request. 
Then one day it stopped. They stopped asking me for help. They stopped holding my hand. They stopped wanting me to walk them to school and they stopped asking me to bandage their knees and kiss it better.
They started getting embarrassed by public shows of affection and the words " I love you" were never to be spoken in front of friends.
The dancing stopped in the stores and they didn't even want me to pick their clothes.
No notes in lunch boxes please. After all the girl I like might see it or one of my friends. 
Bouquets of dandelions and weeds were replaced with a quick hug and rushed I love you as they ran out the door.
My boys are growing up and they are leaving me behind and although in my heart I am proud of the handsome, smart and great young men they are becoming, I long for one more night of them being small enough to crawl into my lap and ask me to sing them a good night sone. I long for the little grubby hands to reach for mine, and the days my clothes were always dirty from little pig pens jumping into my arms when they came home. 
I know they have to grow up. I accept this and when they stand by my side one taller than me and the other almost as tall, I am pleased that I can say without a doubt that they love me and are good boys. 
Still... I miss all the last first times I didn't realize I was having at the time.
For those of you with little ones, don't begrudge that late night feeding or those early morning wake up cries. Don't fuss about the hand prints on the walls or the bugs in the pockets. There will come a day when you will long for one more rolly polly filled pocket, one more dandelion bouquet, one more good night kiss.
Cherish each moment as if it were the last. It just might be after all.

13 comments:

  1. aww. I can now imagine how my mom will feel - University starts on September 1st and I will be off to dorms again.
    And don't be sad! You still have little Lilly :)
    *Big hugs* :)

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  2. Just means that you've done your job and done it well.

    You might want to invest in a puppy.

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  3. Oh man, I know exactly what you mean. Mine are still little, I still get the weeds and dandelions and the random I love yous and I poud (proud) yous. I am terrified of the days when they won't be so often offered. Hell, I hate when they stop mispronouncing things! Stop growing up, darnit!!!!
    I will take your advice and cherish my spider man wall art! Thank you for reminding us all!

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  4. Beautiful words! Wise words!
    Yes, you've done very well your Mom job. Congratulations!

    Thanks for your nice comment on my Mom's old pictures.

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  5. Great memories for us to think back on.

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  6. You said it! My youngest is my only son, and he's a sophomore in college. I miss him tremendously during the school year, and often wish for just one more day of him being a sweet little boy again,

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  7. awww. so very sweet. bless them as they continue growing up.

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  8. So true. Both of my daughters are grown now and I also miss those days. I'm waiting for them to marry and have grandchildren so that it can start all over again... :)

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  9. Oh, those last firsts are a big deal! We do understand how you feel...{{{hugs}}}

    ...I long for one more night of them being small enough to crawl into my lap and ask me to sing them a good night sone. I long for the little grubby hands to reach for mine, and the days my clothes were always dirty from little pig pens jumping into my arms when they came home... <--Well, this is why you'll have grandchildren!

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  10. Such great memories!! Why do I feel sad?

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  11. No one ever tucks me in... not even when I ask. It's so depressing.

    Junior High... Doesn't time fly, Melynda? Why can't it just walk, you know... at a leisurely pace or stop for a moment.

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  12. Aww...this was so sweet. Especially the part about not realizing at the time that it was the last first time. So beautifully put. I'm not a mom, just a stepmom, but I know how fast time flies. Seems like just yesterday my stepdaughter was 8 and now she's in high school!

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