Tuesday, April 29, 2014

What goes around comes around!

I was telling stories on my kids today and this one amused me greatly so I thought I would share.
When I worked at a fast food place, for more years than I care to mention, we used to always prank the new people. I know. Not nice and very, shall we say, politically incorrect?? We would tell the new kids they had to do pickle inventory. They were 5 gallon buckets of pickles. Then periodically as they counted we would talk to them and they would have to start over because they lost count. Eventually we would tell the poor saps that we knew how many pickles there were. 5 gallons.
We also told them to mop the deep freeze. Of course the mop always froze to the floor immediately, and the kid ALWAYS sat there forever trying to get it off the floor. Also mean I understand that. 
My daughter, however, had the best one pulled on her.
She started working for a food storage company last year and when she asked what her job title was someone told her she was a BM. 
Now, please understand that my child, although extremely intelligent, lacks the ability to distinguish a joke.
So, when a neighbor suggested she come do some work in her lawyers firm she gladly accepted. When asked what her previous position was... You guessed it she spat out BM. 
My neighbor about crapped her pants. Of course I get an immediate text stating and I quote
"I'm dyeing right now! Your kid just told the lawyer that her last job was a BM! Please tell me that is not a real job title???"
At this point all the mean things I did to those kids kept trotting through my mind. What goes around comes around I guess.

Monday, April 28, 2014

Political correctness

My brother,Shannon, and I have a special bond. We always have, and he is one of my best friends in the world.
We both have long term if not life long diseases, we both love kids and animals and we both have a sick sense of humor. 
What? A sick sense of humor? YOU? You might be wondering... Well yes. It's true.
Shan and I have decided we need to go on a sick comedy tour. 
Let me explain.
You know by now that I am diabetic, going blind, have neropathy in my whole body, and kidney problems, and am an asthmatic. Not a big deal. Just part of my life.
Shannon has asthma, seizures, not epilepsy as he is fully conscious when it happens, along with many more debilitating problems. 
We figure that while he is having a seizure I could throw some clothes on him and laundry soap. Mind you that would involve me being able to see where he is to do so. It could get quite messy. :)
People do not understand how we can joke about such serious matters. We have to. If we can't laugh at ourselves we would curl up and die.
Why am I telling you this? Because I am so sick of the political correctness crap. Most blind people don't get offended if you should use sight words.
 For example when people say "It's nice to see you." I laugh and say "It's nice to almost see you too." Or if they say" Have you seen so and so?" I respond "Why No. Haven't seen them in years." At this point the person feels bad for some reason. I am joking. Why should they feel bad? I'm not offended. Why are they offended on my behalf? I didn't ask for that. I just want to laugh and have a good time. Most handicap people don't get upset if you say crippled or other terms. Most deaf people can't even hear or know what you are saying. In fact it is more offensive to most of us that have these debilitating problems for you to dehumanize what we are going through by either ignoring or using terms that leave no room for humanity.

You might be offended, but we who are disabled don't give a crap.
We are stronger than most normal healthy people due to the issues we have to go through. We joke about ourselves and our problems.
I'm not saying you have to be obnoxious about it and make fun of our issues every time you open your mouth but for heavens sake's lighten up. WE make fun of YOU for doing some serious tap dancing around the subject. For the love of all that is holy people, please, relax.  

Friday, April 25, 2014

To my son Kyle on his birthday.

Today is one of the most special and important days of my life!
17 years ago on this day I gave birth to my beautiful,10.5 lbs baby boy. 
Oh yes. It's gonna be another one of those post!

Dear Kyle,
When I begged and pleaded for God to give me a boy, I had no idea he would give me one as special as you.
I remember holding you for the first time. I cried and cried. You were so perfect.
I remember you biting my boob, even though i didn't breast feed you, and drawing blood. Still have that scar. Kinda hard to forget that moment.
I remember trying to feed you. You were so impatient I had to hold your arms down so you wouldn't knock the spoon out of my hand.
I remember taking you to school for the first time. Again I cried all the way home, then rushed back before the 2 hours where up.
I remember you bringing me dandelion heads that you had picked for me and put in a glass of water. Even though I was allergic to them I loved every single one of them. 
I remember you crawling into my lap because you had a bad dream or had fallen and hurt yourself.
I remember the stitches and the hospital visits.
I remember you saying you loved me for the first time and your little hand in mine.
Now you are all grown up and growing away from all those little things that I loved so much. Yet, still you hug and kiss me every morning and tell me you love me. 
I don't know what I ever did to deserve you but know that whatever it was I will always be grateful for it. 
I love you son. No matter what happens during your life never forget that.
Oh and Thank you for leaving your Facebook page open for me to access. I had a lot of fun talking myself up to your friends yesterday. Please repeat that action often.
Love Mom.

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Happy Birthday to you Shannon Dean Williams!

Today is my brother Shannon's Birthday. Shannon is one of my best friends in the world. I don't know what I would do without him. 
I remember so many times when he was young how he would drive my parents nuts, because he was so stubborn. 
One of my mom's favorite stories links into one of my favorite stories.
She says that dad would put Shannon in bed and as he walked back down the hall, he would hear little feet following him. 
Turning, Shannon would be right on his heels. Dad would swat his bottom and put him back to bed. This would go on for quite some time. The reason this is so funny, is because Shannon has a beautiful daughter named Jordan. Sweet nature d as she is, she is very much like her daddy. I was watching her once when she did something that Shan felt was inappropriate. (It was but I have to spare her now, adult feelings and not repeat it.)
Shan sat her on the couch and told her not to move. As he turned away from her I saw her pounce out of the chair like the energizer bunny. I gasped then laughed as he swatted her on the rear and sat her back down. Over and over this scenario played out and I watched laughing harder every time. 
"It's not funny." He scowled at me. 
"Oh but it is.: I giggled wishing my mom could see this play out.
She did. When they went to Texas to visit my brother Shan put Jordan to bed, and Jordan got right back up and went to Mom's room. 
I believe the story goes that she said "Grandma. I"m here." Before my brother snatched her up and off they went again.
So dear brother, just remember that what goes around comes around. As my son reminds me more and more of you I will be sending him your direction. I feel it is only fair that you deal with the young you.  He was born the day after your birthday so it only seems fair. After all I didn't act that way. :)
I love you. Miss you. Wish I could be with you today. 
Hope it is truly the best day ever!

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

My friend the Silver Back.

I talked to my friend Jess yesterday. I have known the man for 15 years now. On top of the fact that he is married to my best friend, he is like a brother to me. To describe Jess, is easy.
He is a good ol all American boy who is about to retire from the US Air Force.
The first time I met him, his wife had invited me over for dinner. My now ex and Jess worked together, and she and I worked together. It was a weird situation.
As we are sitting there having an awkward get to know each other dinner, Jess said something that prompted me to throw something at him. Next thing I know the man has a fully loaded water gun and the war began. Right in the middle of dinner. My ex and Christy sat there staring at us as we ran around the house like children making a horrible mess and laughing the whole time.
Many more of these water gun fights, TPing and other such nonsense has occurred over the years. He refers to me as Pumkin, or the buttless, boobless wonder and I refer to him as the Silver back. He is hairy as an Silver back ape.
I am proud to be the friend of such an outstanding Patriot. I am proud of him for all he has accomplished. I know this next journey in his life will be just fine. I miss you and your family Silver back. REally hope you get a job out here. :)  

Saturday, April 19, 2014

My hero, yet my victim.

I stood as a child on that hill. Tears poured down my cheeks. I wasn't sure what I was looking for or why I was crying. I just knew something was wrong. Something was missing. I watched and I waited. Again not knowing what it was I was searching for nor why I sobbed. 
A hand gently took mine. It was much bigger than mine, and stronger also. I felt the scars and the breeze that blew through the hole piercing the wrist of the hand holding mine. What was this?
Peace washed over me instantly. 
An image filled my mind.
A man so badly bruised and beaten he barely looked alive. In fact I wondered how any man could be alive that had received such blows. His face was swollen where his beard had been ripped out of his face and a cruel crown of poisonous thorns crowned his brow. Blood flowed from his wounds, as he walked quietly along carrying a rough, splintery tree. I gagged at the sight. Who could have done this? Why would this be allowed? The crowd watched, laughed and spat on this gentle creature. Still he persevered on his course. One painful, splinter filled step at a time. Flesh hung from his back and I could only imagine the pain he was enduring. I sobbed as I watched him fall to the ground, weak, yet meek. 
They nailed him to the cross and raised it high on the hill so everyone could see his shame, his suffering. Still they mocked. After hours of this torment, a soldier approached to pierce his side and finish him off, but he had already died.
I sat there crying as I realized I killed him. I stroke every blow. Every lie, every sin I had committed was just as responsible for His death as the ones that held the hammer. 
Slowly the vision faded and I turned to the man holding my hand. It was Him. Jesus held my hand and wiped away my tears. I could see the love in His eyes. I fell to my knees. He had risen as He had promised. He had conquered the grave and hell itself. 
I knew in that moment that He forgave me. I knew that He would keep forgiving me even as I knew that I would keep pounding those nails in over and over. I would keep picking up that cat of nine tails and beating Him until His flesh was flayed from His back.
I knew He was my Savior and Mediator with God. My hero, yet my victim.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Life regrets.

I was asked the other day if I could change anything in my life what would it be. It could be anything. I thought for a minute. (That's about all I can do. One minute of thinking. )
I would worry less about the messes and focus more on the people that made the messes.
I would work less, love more, and learn everything I could.
I would go back in time and hold my babies close and realize they won't be babies for long.
I would listen to advice given to me by more experienced people and not wait till after disaster struck to say I should have listened.
I would never have picked up that first cigarette.
The question was then asked
"Knowing what you know now, that you would get divorced, would you have married your first husband?"
I would have. Up's and down's don't change the fact that I have my two beautiful children because of my marriage. I wouldn't exchange them for anything in the world.
"So no regrets? No people you would eliminate from the picture?"
Not one! Every person that has come into my life is another piece of the puzzle that has made me who I am.
Without those good and bad relationships, I would not have learned the life lessons I needed to learn.
It was an interesting conversation with a young woman half my age. I wanted to tell her 41 is not ancient, but then I remembered being her age. 41 does seem ancient. It seems like an unreachable age when you are in your early 20's.
So I smiled, and prayed that in some way this child before me would take into consideration my regrets and not make the same choices. She will.
She will get angry over spilt milk, dirty clothes, smudges on walls and tracks on floors.
She will groan when it is time to read bed time stories, and tuck her little one in.
She will miss it in a couple of years and wonder why she didn't stop to enjoy each precious moment.
I think this is the reason we get to have grandchildren. A second chance to enjoy every moment we didn't think about when we had our babies.
If I am wrong, so be it. I just know that I am taking every chance to rock Lily, sing her songs, and enjoy every giggle and smile sent my way.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Things I hope my kids learn before I die!

First of all I have a new computer! Yay! Maybe this one will let me actually have access to the internet that I pay so dearly for.
On to the post!
Things I hope my children learn before I die:
Beating the snot out of your siblings really does not accomplish anything (Verbal counts also)
Asking where your stuff is, that you used and put somewhere is also pointless. It didn't grow legs and walk away! Find it!
Holding grudges only hurts you. The person you are holding a grudge against is only minimally affected, if at all. You will just get ulcers, and go bald fretting about it.
Cleaning up after yourself is not the end of the world. You made the mess clean it up! I am not your slave, I believe that was abolished many, many years ago. Could be wrong, but look up Abe Lincoln.
Getting mad at a teacher because you didn't turn your homework in is asinine. You are to blame. Not your teacher.
Playing video games till all hours of the wee morning will get you no where in life.
Your friends should not dictate your behavior, your sleep habits, your eating habits, your clothing, your life. You are in charge of that and no one else. You have to be happy with yourself and find happiness in yourself. No one can do it for you.
I hope above all else that you are respectful, legal, upstanding citizens, that work hard, play hard, and contribute to society. That you always remember the key to a successful life is God first, then family, then friends and society.
Think outside the box, never give up on your dreams, and know that your mama loves you and is very proud of you. Understand that God loves you even more than I do.
Now for heavens sakes go clean up your room. It makes me want to vomit!

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

A military life.

Due to the reaction to my last post I though I should clear some things up.
Since the beginning of the Armed forces, less than 1 percent of the population has served. It is still a substantial number of people and families. 
However, when our men and women join, as spouses we understand, (believe me it has been made clear from the get go) that there are dangers, and there will be times when we will be alone. 
It is something that we undertake in support of our men and women that serve to protect our freedoms and rights as American citizens. Most spouses that read my last post laughed and cried, stating they had said most of those things at one point or another. 
It is our lives. We get it. 
I did not mean to exclude the men that stay at home with the kids. I am sure they are just as lonely, sad, and sometimes even distraught over their spouses being gone. I can only speak for the women as they are the ones that I know.
I have been a military spouse for almost 20 years. No one can take that from me. I have worked hard taking care of my children, the house, bills, animals and yes even vehicles. Sometimes even dealing with work and school at the same time. 
Not everyone is cut out to be a military spouse. This is why the divorce rate is almost 50 percent. However, the military has changed their stance on families. They are starting to realize that an unhappy home makes a bad soldier. More and more they are reaching out to the families with support groups, and different programs for the children and spouses to participate in. 
Please never take what I wrote as a complaint. It is just our way of living. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I am proud of my guy and what he does. I am proud that I am raising children who love and respect their country and what it has taken to give them the freedoms that they have. I am proud every day at 5 when the Anthem plays and children stop playing, face the music or flag, with hands over their little hearts. It is a breath taking sight. It gives back some of the pride in our Nation that many seem to have lost. 
I hope that clears up any misconceptions that may have occurred due to my last post.

Saturday, April 5, 2014

What it means to be a military wife.

These are excerpts from multiple military wives.
Dear husband,
All four tires blew today. Ran over construction nails. Don't have the money to fix them. Guess the kids and I are walking.
Dear husband, 
They messed up your check again. Not enough money to pay the bills and get food. Sorry but I have to feed the kids.
Dear husband,
I don't care if you are missing a leg. I will still love you no matter what. It will be fine don't worry.
Dear husband, 
I miss you. It's hard being mommy and daddy at the same time.
Dear husband,
I'm pregnant! We are having a boy!
Dear husband,
Our baby was born. He is has all 10 fingers and toes. :) However, he has a heart defect. They are going to do surgery. I'll let you know what happens.
Dear husband,
The Air Conditioner is broke again. It's 90 degrees in the house. They say I am on a waiting list. Could take up to a  month to fix it. Of course by then I won't need it. Grrrr.
Dear husband, 
There is 3 feet of snow outside. I got written up for not clearing it. I don't know what they expect. I'm not  supposed to have any closed doors between me and our kids but it's to cold to take them out.
Dear husband,
Please come home soon. I can't take it.
Dear husband,
Spring it here. I miss you. I wish you could see the kids! They love it.
Dear husband,
Got a dog for the kids. I know you said not to but they need something. They cry for you every night, and ask when you are coming home.
Dear husband,
Took the kids to see Santa. They told him all they want is for you to come home for Christmas.
Dear husband,
It's been a year. Thank God for Skype! I would forget what you look like otherwise. I'm forgetting what your touch feels like. I miss you.
Dear husband,
The dumpster fell over on me today. It was so heavy I had to wait for one of the neighbors to come out and rescue me. Pretty sure I bruised my butt.
Dear husband, 
Our child died today.
Dear husband, 
Kindergarten started today. 
I was so nervous I followed the bus all the way to school. After sitting there for a while I rushed home. No worries. I got there before the bus drove her back..
Dear husband, 
I hope you are safe. Heard the base you are at got bombed.
Dear husband, 
Please let me know you are safe. I'm terrified right now.. Haven't heard from you in days!
Dear husband, 
Sorry I missed your call. I was working and they kept me late. I'll make sure I'm there next week when you call. I miss you. Why are you only allowed to talk 10 minutes? That's dumb.
Dear husband,
Goodbye for the last time. I wish I could have been there. I will never forget you or your bravery.. Know that I am proud to call myself your wife. The kids don't understand why you will never be back. I'm trying to explain but they just keep crying. 
I still can't believe I will never kiss you again. You will never touch me again and hold me. We will never laugh together again. I know you did what you had to but if you were still alive we would be having a serious fight mister.
Yours, truly, love you with all my heart, miss you.
Military wives

Thursday, April 3, 2014


My computer is giving me fits. Please excuse my long absence. Not sure how long I can be on this thing but for now it is working..
I am so sick and tired of our youth. They have no respect, no work ethic, no discipline whatsoever. 
I know that sounds harsh, but it is a fact. I love kids don't get me wrong. However our society has determined that kids can do whatever they like and we can't stop them because it is abuse.
My Mamaw has a different take on things. She has a switch. (if you hadn't guessed by her name she is a Southern lady.)
When we were kids she would switch us when we disobeyed, fought or any other inappropriate behavior. 
Monster! Barbarian! I know, I know! Not very politically correct. However, to this day we adore her. 
One time my brothers and I were climbing on the outside of the banister. The stairs were marble and we must have been at least 7 feet off the ground. We had been told multiple times not to do this but it was fun. As we hung there precariously my youngest brother howled, then my middle brother howled, I knew it was coming and sure enough I howled. Mamaw stood behind us on the stairs below walking up and down just a switchin us. It stung like blue blazes. Right on the backside. When we scrambled up and over the banister she came and faced us. 
"I told ya'll not to do that. You are gonna crack your skulls open. Don't do it again or I'll give you, youngins another."
We did NOT do that again. 
We got many switchins. Sometimes she would just pull it out and the threat alone would stop our behavior. It never bruised us. It just stung. My point is we sit and wonder why our younger generations are acting the way they do, yet we have taken the 10 commandments out of schools, we won't let our precious babies be disciplined by the schools and we don't do it ourselves. They have no enforced rules.
I really think what this world needs is a few more Mamaw's with switches.